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Cheat Codes

no one deserves to be cheated on. that effed up thing could change the way you see yourself. "am i not enough? why am i never enough?" It definitely could damage your self worth. it's even traumatizing at some point. you would think that all people are the same, and there is no good girl/guy out there who'll get your back. well, the thing is, maybe they messed up because they're a mess. maybe they're once a victim and get insecure about commitment or trusting people in the first place. or maybe they're just a**holes, i don't know. good news for you: you've been set free, and only you can get your own back. and please note this, not everyone is the same, you're worthy of something better than this. just have a little faith and do your own inner job to detox the mess out. pray or wish the best for the cheater, because it would be hard to someday realize, that they loss the best thing they ever had.

Hate Wins

and finally i'm in this intersection, i want it but i hate it for this thing was never been good for myself yet the promise it keeps still haunting me for the first time in forever, i hope the hate wins.

Space

like words needed space to be understood, maybe us too.

What Ifs

Life is full of choice, therefore life is full of what-ifs. What if i don't do that? What if i do that? It's all in your head. The irony is, even if we're thinking about all the what-ifs, you can't undo what you had decide. Sure, it's needed to reflect on your what-ifs in a good amount. It helped you evaluate your decision, and it helped you grow as a person. But too much what-ifs could make you regretting things or even hate yourself for the imaginary thought of it. Heck, how come we know these what-ifs are going to be better than our reality? Could we just be our own bestfriend, be kind, and forgive ourselves? Cause in the end, every mistake you make, every decision you take, is what makes you who you are. Let's not have it any other way.

What actually kill you?

what actually kill you? what actually kill you is not the way people treat you what actually kill you is not the promise others can't keep what actually kill you is not silence from the other side what actually kill you is you. yes, you. your expectation of others. like all the cliche said, you can't expect somebody to treat you the way you treat them. because you are a total different heart, body, and soul. you can't control what you can't control. i'm not saying to have no expectation at all, let's be honest, it's one of the things to keep you going. but like one of my friend said to me, you can't let expectation from uncertainty controls and ruins you. rise above it, be the bigger person, and enjoy your ride!

Cahaya

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terangku terangnya cita cahaya abadi ku jaga terangnya cahaya padam abadi tiada tercipta nyata terangku lenyap sirna tanpa sisa

The Bet

i know many times people eventually disappoint you, till one day your soul decide it's enough and won't ever trust anyone anymore. but somewhere along the way, believe me, you'll find somebody worthy your trust. they might seem like any others but you have to trust time to reveals who they really are. piece by piece they will allow you to know them deeper and deeper. you'll fall into them, to their thick black hair, perfect smile, their persona and their souls. you suddenly know what love songs is all about, and they will make all the waits and all the heartaches in the past is finally worth it. but it won't happen to you, if you always generalize all people as the same mistake. it's not okay to glued one person mistake with everyone you meet up later. and this is what betting is. you bet your fragile heart into this one. either they're gonna break it, or keep it, eventually you're gonna be more than okay.